I know it's only been a couple of days, but quite a lot's been going on and I HAVE AN IDEA!!
This is a very rare occasion for me, it doesn't happen very often- so be grateful that I'm sharing it with you!
(Haha, I'm just kidding- I don't care whether you want to hear it or not, I'm telling you anyway so stuff that!)
So today I took part in a concert-on my own. Let me rephrase this, ON MY OWN. I'm not great with stuff like this, I shake a lot and I tend to say a lot of stupid things when I get nervous. But it happens, and I don't think that we should just ignore it.
We all get nervous, right? Whether it's a big deal or not. I mean, a few weeks ago my school had exams (I know I've mentioned this before but, as Tilly would say: Bare With. Not particularly good advice, but there you go...). And whether we liked it or not, we were all nervous wrecks- and there was nothing we could have done about it.
I hate that feeling, it's like you know you shouldn't be worrying- but you do anyway. It's totally not worth it in the end, but that doesn't stop you from curling up in a shaking ball of nothingness and moaning depressingly about equations.
It's not just exams or concerts either- it can be a lot of things. But generally, you get nervous when you have to do something you haven't come across before. You get nervous because you don't know what's going to happen next.
So... can you guess what my theme of today's post is?
Nervous: A feeling or reaction resulting from anxiety or anticipation.
I'm going to do this post because we don't usually talk about this sort of thing with other people. But it's one of those things that we just have to talk about. We all get nervous, don't we? So what's the point in pretending that we don't?
It's not a mistake to be nervous, it's human nature.
Sometimes we get things right, and sometimes we don't. A lot of the time it isn't down to what we actually know that makes us get things right- but it's how we control the nerves. We know the stuff anyway- but nerves determine whether we forget them or not.
Let's go back to this concert that I performed in today. I was quite nervous, but I wasn't totally freaking out. Normally, I guess I would be, but there was another friend of mine who was scared to death- and I found that making her feel a bit better, also made me feel a bit better too.
But when I got up there, the spotlight literally made me freeze. I know that sounds so cliché, but it froze my brain. For a moment I forgot what I was doing and why I was even there in the first place. And do you know why that happened? It happened because I was nervous.
(Wow, Luce. What a way to be obvious, huh? Maybe you should title the post 'Nervous Freezes' aswell to make it even harder for people to guess!)
Then I realised what I was doing. Finally! It felt like I had stood there for two minutes doing absolutely nothing. In reality, it would have only been a couple of seconds, but it felt like so much longer.
So... I started the piece. The first note went brilliantly. But after that, it went downhill. I missed out a whole section. My nerves took over.
I'm not usually that picky- but when you miss out something- you HAVE to add it back in. You just CAN'T MISS ANYTHING OUT. So, I tried to fit it in, which didn't work. I tried, and I tried again. The piano accompaniment was probably wondering what on earth I was trying to do.
Now that was where it went wrong. Then I realised that I was making myself look like a complete idiot. I didn't usually play like this, so if I was going to perform in front of a room of people then I had to suck up everything I had inside of me and just play the goddamn piece.
From there, it got better.
And better.
And then I finished, with a bow, a round of applause and a hasty sprint off the stage.
(I probably shouldn't do that next time, now that I think about it)
My nerves took over me, that's sort of their job- isn't it? And when I realised that things weren't going to get any better unless I sucked it up, they went away.
I know that I could have demonstrated this using different examples. There are so many fairytales and better examples that a lot of people can relate to.
Imagine what George Clooney (hashtag fairytale) would have felt like at his first audition- but now look where he's at. He's one of the most well-known male actors in the career.
Ed Sheeran at his first gig. I have no idea how he managed to suck up the courage to do what he did at only 13- but he did it, and now look at him. The Ginger Jesus has made himself known.
Neil Armstrong had no idea what was going to be outside when he took his first steps on the moon. But what did he do? He did it anyway, and that's why we know his name today.
Barack Obama did not become President of the United States by luck. He sucked it up, and he just did what he had to do. Now he has a lookalike, parodies made after him and he met Tyler Oakley (he must be a goddamn good President if he met the Queen)
There are so many people who have achieved great things. We always hear about what they've managed to do, but we never hear about what they had to do to get there in the first place. Each one of them would get nervous, but they sucked it up anyway and carried on with life. It's human nature, it's simply what we do.
So we shouldn't ignore it. Why do we even ignore it?
It's not going to go away with the push of a button. But if we ignore it, it will control us. Accept the fact that we get nervous, and let yourself be nervous. Becoming afraid of it will only encourage it. If you focus on what you actually have to do, just do it. There's no point in making yourself look like an idiot, when you know you aren't.
You can achieve so much, everyone has the potential to do what they want to do.
So do it.
Fly On,
Luce xx
PS: I'm saving a lot of songs for the playlist that I was going on about on the last post. So I don't have any songs to recommend you this time.
However, do check out All The Luck In The World, Panic! At The Disco and Paradise Fears.
All amazing bands :)
PPS: Same goes as the last post, if you have any music you'd like to recommend me then pop it in the comments. If you have anything you want me to talk about, pop that in the comments too. Remember, you can be anonymous!
PPPS: You're amazing and beautiful and I think you should know that you lovely person you
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